buying a car

I absolutely HATE buying a new car. It is my least favorite thing to do. This time I am buying a "pre-owned" car. It is a 2007 model. You would think I was attempting to buy the Taj Mahal. They tag-teamed me. They added in hidden costs that they didn't explain - talked about items as if they were throwing them in for free when they weren't - tried to double back on things they offered me ... then when I tried to go out the door, the big dog appeared and asked for a dollar figure that I could live with. I low-balled it - he balked - I walked. I drove home. Within five minutes of walking in the door, the phone rang and they met me half way. I told the salesman that I needed to talk to my "fiance" and to call me in 30 minutes. He did. I said a figure that was between my lowball and the figure they had just offered. Now I am waiting for him to call me back. In some ways this is fun. In other ways it is just annoying. They just called. They offered a little bit higher than my offer. I suppose I have to let them win something. I told him I would be over in about 45 minutes. If I get over there and they screw around with me, I will walk away again.

moving

I heard from the movers today. They will be here on Friday (18th) to pack my things. The truck will be here on Saturday (19th) to load. The expected delivery in Memphis will be between the 25th and the 29th. So why am I still procrastinating about the last minute things that I need to do? Because that is how I roll. God forbid that I get a few things done every day so I am not running around like a madwoman on the last couple of days. No, that would be entirely too easy!!!

I got out the cat carrier tonight and Joe immediately freaked out and went into hiding. He refuses to leave the den and is hiding under the end table where we can't reach him. I suppose I thought I would give him a few days to get used to the idea, but I think I am probably just making it worse!!! Poor guy.

Now that I know the dates, I am absolutely ready to go!

more surgery

Sam had his post-operative visit with his surgeon today. All of the bandages came off and we saw his hand for the first time since surgery. We actually took pictures with our cell phones, but I am not going to ruin your day by showing them here! It was pretty gross. But all fingers are there. He can wiggle them all. He can bend all fingers except his middle finger. They took fresh x-rays. That middle finger was really blasted - lots of bone fragments. Dr. Champagne (a wonderful hand surgeon) decided he wants to do a second surgery to install a plate in the middle finger so the finger will be more stable.

After the surgeon's visit we went to a Physical Therapist who specializes in making custom splints that exactly fit the patient's hand. I watched him while he created the one-of-a-kind splint for Sam's hand. Sam jokingly refers to it as his "Darth Vadar glove", because it is made out of a dark black material. It looks more like one of those carpal tunnel support braces except it extends over the two fingers to protect him from accidental bumps, which would be excrutiating.

This whole experience has been eye-opening. I talked to so many other patients. One woman sliced the tip of her finger off when she was cutting fabric with one of those rotary cutters. She sure was mad at herself. Another young man had flown over the handlebars of his four-wheeler and braced his arms out in front of him, breaking both hands. A young father had sliced the end of a finger off at work. A very young girl had put her hand through a plate glass window. The list goes on. The hand is quite vulnerable! Sam's injury was atypical. They do see accidental gunshot wounds to the hand, but they are usually not the fault of someone other than the victim! Had Sam not also had the bullet wounds (entry and exit) on his right thigh where his hand was resting, it might not have been so obvious that he was not at fault in this accident.

Again, Sam was lucky to escape with the injuries he has. It could have been so much worse!

cool again

Air conditioning is a wonderful invention - especially in July - in Phoenix - and is most appreciated shortly after it begins working again - after a night spent sweating while a giant fan blew warm air directly at my not-quite-sleeping miserable body. I think it is safe to say that I am incredibly spoiled and will not survive in any post-apocalypse life that does not include air conditioning, massages, nail salons, Ben & Jerry's ice cream and Princess cruises. (Someone would just need to shoot me right after the mushroom cloud dissipated.) That is more of a good reason to vote DEMOCRATIC!!! :-)

too darn hot

It is only 96 degrees, but the humidity is 38% and climbing. And the air conditioning in the house is broken. What timing!!! The only time we have any humidity and the air conditioning goes out. It is just miserable in this house!!! The temperature will slowly drop between now (5 p.m.) and tomorrow morning, but the humidity will steadily climb. Twelve hours from now it will be 84 degrees and 71% humidity. Arggghhhhhh! The air conditioning repair serviceman will arrive between 8 a.m. and 9 a.m. tomorrow morning, at which time I will bludgeon him to death for not coming sooner. I will blame it on the heat and humidity and I will go free.

Sam has gone off to spend the night with a buddy. I did not want him to go, but when I expressed my concern, he answered in the way young people do - "Mom, I'm 21. I can take care of myself!" - oblivious to the fact that he almost got his hand shot off and was completely dependent on me for almost a week. Sigh - I know I was the same way - probably worse! I will just have to deal with my worry - while I sweat.

home again

This morning I was on my way into the office when Sam called to say that they were releasing him from the hospital - without even transferring him from ICU to a regular room. So I changed directions and headed to the hospital. When I got there, he was pretty upset because they had not given him any pain medication yet. I explained to him that he was in ICU and was probably surrounded by several critical care cases, but he was not affected by my logic. He was hurting!

His nurse (Erin) came in with his meds and said that the doctor would be making his rounds between 8 :30 a.m. and 9:00 a.m. and would probably sign off on his release. The clock ticked away. At 9:30 a.m., Erin said she would have the doctor paged if he had not appeared by 10. At 10 a.m., 10:30 a.m., and 11:00 a.m., Erin paged the doctor. Finally, at about 11:20 a.m., the doctor appeared. He said that he had told the resident to release Sam early that morning. Sigh.

So we quickly got Sam's things together and headed out. He was so happy to get in my car to drive away. We stopped by Arby's on the way home to get his favorite fast food meal, then dropped off his prescriptions. We made it home and he planted himself on the sofa and happily ate while playing with the TV remote control.

I went in and worked half a day! Sam's girlfriend du jour came over to hang out with him while I was at work. I just got home and they were both asleep. I had to wake her up because she has to go to work tonight.

I am happy to have him home!!!

Tuesday night update

Wow - what a difference! Sam actually got up and went for a walk today! He is off the IV pain medication and is hooked up to the IV only when he is receiving antibiodics. They have the combination worked out and he is off all monitoring equipment. He will be moved to a regular room some time tonight. The true sign that he is feeling better - he sent me home because his girlfriend is visiting tonight. They even told him that he might go home tomorrow, depending on his pain level. He is still hurting quite a bit, but is tolerating it better. I am very relieved!!!

Tuesday update on Sam

Sam is still in ICU and is still in quite a bit of pain, but he is okay. He even sent me home last night and I was able to sleep in my own bed. His surgeon was supposed to come by to look at his hand today, but has not yet shown up. I'm getting ready to head back over to the hospital now.

The kindness from friends & family has been most appreciated! Several prayer chains were working on Sam. The new need is to help Sam gear up for recovery. He will need to focus on healing and on figuring out what he can and can not do with his right hand. I'm sure he has some frustrating moments ahead of him. I don't want him to get depressed, which is often a result of injuries like this. Thank you all for your continued prayers and kind words.

Then we must also get refocused on our cross-country move. That should be fun!!!

son in hospital

My son is in the hospital following a gun accident. One of his friends carelessly handled a gun in his presence and the gun went off. One bullet did extensive damage to his right hand, then traveled through his right thigh. He had surgery to repair the hand last night, which (for now) has saved the two fingers that were affected, though one will never bend again. Today he was moved to ICU because the blend of narcotics was causing his breathing to be sporadic. He is now hooked up to a machine that monitors his breaths and emotes a loud BEEP if he doesn't breathe, which startles him into breathing. They are working on the drug combination to try to get it right.

Having not slept for 72 hours, I came home for a nap. Since the plan is to move him back to the regular ward after they get the drug combination figured out, we thought I better take advantage of the close supervision he is getting in ICU and get a few hours of sleep. I am headed back to the hospital now.

I'm so angry about this accident. The young man who shot him and another friend were competing to see who could disassemble and assemble guns the fastest. The first rule of gun safety is to remove the clip and check the chamber for a bullet. He did not do the latter. My son was standing nearby and is now paying the price for his friend's carelessness. The irony is that my son doesn't even like guns and thinks the friends are overly obsessed with their guns. But Sam is an equal opportunity friend and has friends from many different backgrounds. They have a wide variety of interests.

There is nothing quite as horrible for parents than to see their child in excrutiating pain and not be able to do a thing about it. That is how things felt very early this morning when he began to feel pain after the conclusion of the surgery. It was quite terrible.

This morning when Sam's breathing was still not under control (before he was moved to ICU), I was sitting with my hand on his chest. When he didn't take a breath, I tapped him on the chest with my fingers to startle him into breathing. He looked at me and said, "Mom, if I die, please cremate me and put my ashes in the ocean." I agreed to do that, but added, "But you are NOT going to die, because I won't LET you die. I am right here and I am not going anywhere until they get you to a safe place." The fact that he was contemplating his own death at the age of 21 told me that he was frightened beyond what he was showing. And that made me weep.

I will have more details later.

independence day

HBO is running all parts of their John Adams series today. The history of my country has been documented in many different formats, but none so moving as this! It is truly amazing. I weep every time I watch the vote on the amendment to separate from England and King George. Even though I know from British history that the king was a bit demented and probably had a medical reason for making such bad decisions about the colonies in America, I still marvel at the bravery that led those few men to vote for such a measure. Then the reading of the Declaration in the town square just makes me boo-hoo. Then the scene showing the inauguration is just too much for me. The actor who plays George Washington is so good.

Today is a day for packing and purging. I have allowed too much useless crap to accumulate and I am really sick of looking at it all. I have managed to take a boatload of paperbacks to a co-worker, but I am still drowning in books. WHY do I have so many? Luckily, I do have professional packers to pack everything. I choose to pack my grandmothers' Limoge and other delicates and take them with me in the car. But the rest of my belongings will be packed by professionals, which is part of why I have so much crap!!! The last three moves have included professional packers. When you pack your own things, you tend to purge as you go, sometimes out of just being sick of packing.

I also need to buy a car today. No big deal, right? Sigh. I just want it to be done for me. I wish someone would start a business conducting car sales - go to dealerships, negotiate a price, argue, bring cars to me to test drive, then bring the paperwork to me to sign. Why hasn't anyone thought to start a business doing that? I would gladly pay for such a service!!!

My extended family is gathered today in Montreat, North Carolina for the annual July 4th family picnic. Last year there were over 120 family members there. This time next year I will be living in Memphis and will be able to drive over for the gathering. I will be so happy to be able to do that! I have missed being with family.

Happy Independence Day!