Tuesday, December 7, 2010

invisible and irresistible

About twelve years ago, I made fun of an older colleague because it was clear that she was drawing her eyebrows on her face and I thought it looked ridiculous. The person I was talking to made a funny face, which I now think meant, "just keep on living". This morning, as I was drawing on my own eyebrows, it occurred to me that life truly does teach you everything you need to know. Sometimes life just takes its own sweet time.

Each time I can't find my car in a parking lot, for instance, I remember another colleague who once offered me a ride to my building because it was raining. I accepted and followed her up and down multiple aisles in a parking lot before she remembered that she had parked in the OTHER lot. I finally gave up and ran to my building, getting soaked in the process. I stopped telling that hysterically funny story when I started losing my own car.

I also remember pointing to older, chubbier women and whispering, "shoot me if I ever start to look like that". I'm not sure whether to be thankful for the fact that none of my older friends own guns or that they have simply forgotten my unnecessary, rude comments. Because I look like that. I look just like that.

The year I became permanently invisible to gorgeous young men was a transition that has been difficult to accept. I'm fortunate that the same man who found me irresistible at age 20 still finds me so at age 52. He apparently still thinks I am the same size as well, judging from the items he purchases in size Petite Small. (This is both charmingly sweet and annoying.) But turnaround is fair play, so I still find him irresistible too.

Now I am on the sharp lookout for the next stage of life, so it will not catch me off guard. My brain tells me that it isn't possible to really prepare. Each change will hit me square between the eyes, just like it does everyone else. Heck, aging on Sims3 was a shock! How do you turn that off, anyway? You can't. Just like you can't turn aging off in real life. Just jump in and hold on for dear life!

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